Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Big Brother/Little Schoolgirl
Holy Lord. I am a protective man. It's very interesting to see what triggers that in me. I'm working on a show right now in a workshop, and last night the director came in to the process (on the weekend, it was the dramaturge working with the actors and the writer). Now, the thing is, I really like this director. He's a real smartie-pants, and I like the way he interacts with me. But my best friend is in this workshop as well, and as it happens, she's beautiful and tall and blonde, and this director is very straight. He's also sort of manic, and has a boyish charm. However, the way he interacts with my best friend - he just wants to touch her all the time, and she's really not into it (I know her well enough to be able to read that), it actually makes me puff my chest out, and turn into some older brother figure. Now, I know that my friend can handle herself, and she doesn't need me to protect her, but there's something a little more primal than logic at play in me. Yesterday, as he was walking up to her, to give her some notes, he was doing this sort of breathy, excited, horny, lascivious laugh, and I nearly picked my friend up and carried her away. Whew! Logic, and my inherent feminism just flies directly out the window.
Also, on another note, my gentleman friend and I have agreed (as soon as I told him about my move, so this is not new), that he could have sex, but not relationships while I'm away, and I suppose I can do the same. He has a profile on an internet dating service (let's be honest, it's a site to hook people up for anonymous sex), and for a while before I told him I was going, he had modified the profile to say that he is seeing someone and so was just looking for friends and chatting. Then I told him about Vancouver, and he took the "seeing someone" out of his profile. In my neurotic panic, I was crushed, and then I look again yesterday, after having (sort of) come to terms with the whole thing, and the fact that he's seeing someone is back in his profile. I'm elated. Like a little schoolgirl.
Also, on another note, my gentleman friend and I have agreed (as soon as I told him about my move, so this is not new), that he could have sex, but not relationships while I'm away, and I suppose I can do the same. He has a profile on an internet dating service (let's be honest, it's a site to hook people up for anonymous sex), and for a while before I told him I was going, he had modified the profile to say that he is seeing someone and so was just looking for friends and chatting. Then I told him about Vancouver, and he took the "seeing someone" out of his profile. In my neurotic panic, I was crushed, and then I look again yesterday, after having (sort of) come to terms with the whole thing, and the fact that he's seeing someone is back in his profile. I'm elated. Like a little schoolgirl.
// posted by MSR @ 5:44 AM 
